Saturday, March 2, 2013

Dear Music Lovers & Drunk People,

Dear Music Lovers & Drunk People,

Let me start by telling you that I love you. 

*Side Note: I learned in many romantic relationships that the previous statement is never a good thing. Bottom line: You f*cked up. There is now a 97% chance there is going to be a BUT that follows somewhere in the next 30 seconds…. Now, interestingly enough, where that inevitable “BUT” appears will determine just how badly you f*cked up. If they go on to tell you how much they love you… then you f*cked it up bad. If they immediately drop the tide changing “but,” then you just kinda f*cked up and may even be able to bull shit your way out of it.

I love making you dance, I love making you bob your head, I even love that you’re drunk and having a good time.  I know… It’s Friday and you’ve worked hard all week.  I know this and love that about you.  It's so great that you are now enjoying our music with such vigor that you think you own the world…….  BUT….  We need to talk about a few things.  We need a little "Pow Wow," music fans and inebriated people. Just you and I.

I just want to give you a heads up about something you should never ever do when attending a live music show….  No matter how much fun you’re having.


  • Jump up on stage in the middle of a set and ask a musician to let you play their instrument/sing on the microphone
  • Jump behind the drums when the band is on break and start banging away like somebody just requested Moby Dick or any other cool ass drum solo.
  • Grab the mic while the band is on break to make announcements of any kind, unless there is a fire or aliens are attacking us like in the movie Independence Day.
  • Demand a song request.  Simply write all requests on a $100 bill and slip it into tip jar or the singer’s hand… works almost every other time.

I know you’re having fun but a musician’s instrument and equipment is their passion.  They spend countless hours practicing and honoring the music that comes out of it.  They don’t want their music or instrument to be disrespected by any uninvited guests.

Things you would never consider doing:
  • Walking on to a construction site and asking the crane operator to step out of the cab so you could try it out
  • Asking your dentist if you could borrow the drill because “That sounds like fun, can I try?”
  • Walking up to a police officer and asking if it's ok if you relieve him of his traffic directing job
You would never try or even think about trying this.

Last night I witnessed a drunk, twenty- something girl walk on to the stage, mid set, and ask a percussionist if she could bang on his drums.  The girl didn’t even wait for an answer and started banging away.  He put a sudden stop to “amateur hour” and shook his head in disgust and sent her away.  She walked off the stage shocked and confused.  You could see the “Why was he so mean?” look written across her face. 

This is the girl in the video below.  She's the one dancing with the giraffe.
Hopefully this letter finds you, drunk Solana Beach twenty- something.  Please come back to see more live music… because I do enjoy your enthusiasm, but please… keep your hands to yourself.



PS If you want to know how blues and reggae mix watch this video, music by Hazmatt featuring Jimmy Zollo on guitar and yours truly on harp:

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